Love ≠ Power

Powerless. This is the first time I felt so powerless in my life. Here in uni. Here in Canberra. Here in Australia. Here, my heart was stolen by someone. Someone whom I love and care so much about.

It has been one week I did not make my bed. And it has been one week too since I last saw B and have a very strong feeling that I would wanna spend every moment with him, again. Undoubtedly, he is the man who makes such a mark in my life. He is also undoubtedly the one whom I'm willing to spend the rest of my life with. I am willing to go forever with him.

Only B. Only he can make me feel so special and cared for. Only he can make me like I'm really gorgeous as he likes to put it. Yet, at the same time, he is also the only one who can make feel so powerless. Powerless that I dunno what to expect. Powerless that I don't have the capacity to change his mind about the whole age issue. Powerless that I can't convince him that I do not mind at all.

These few days have been better though. Getting to meet him the other day and getting several texts from him really got me stoked. He is the only one who can steal my breath away.

Good Gray~!

Good gracious me! Doesn't time flies like a supersonic jet,or anything that could fly faster? Phew, gracious me, it's already Week 8 and it's the last day some more, to add the taste of it. How I wish time would just slow down a little bit. Not that the journey wasn't fulfilling but more like the journey taken as a whole is too precious to lose without the ability to savor it. The semester has moved on so fast that within two weeks' time, it's yet time again to hand in assignments and also undergo some break time, like FINALLY!?! I feel single but at the same time I also think I have not moved on much with B. Besides, I always feel very much loved and cared for whenever I am spending time either with B or A. And now, I even have a "Russian internet boyfriend" who communicate with me on an ongoing basis. Haha. Shouldn't I then feel privileged? Then why am I still feeling very confused and unsatisfied? I suppose the ideal person to take my heart would be B but age is such as issue for him and the fact that we never really did much during the past year. A is also pretty good and that we have very similar thinking but then again this isn't what he wants. And with my RIB, he's still in Russia like D'uh and the fact we have never met and all, it's just too complicated.

And Here I Am

Having an conversation the other day with A made me realized that I actually kinda like him but at the same time it also made me realized that I could have been liking him and wanting him just because I still haven't given up and moved on from B. I know that sounds awfully complicated but that's the way it is now. When he said 'no', initially I did feel a pinch but afterwards I realized it is not a pinch of rejection, but more of a wake up pinch. A wake up call that made realized I could have just been wanting him as a substitute for B. The reason why I finally became clear was because that when B texted me the other day saying he'll probably find out whether he's finally going interstate in two weeks' time, I could still feel the kick in the gut, and hence that's when I found out I have not truly moved on from him. And as I have told myself until I do so, it would be unwise and unfair to let someone else in. And therefore, I haven't and here I am being single and all. 

Sometimes Old Tricks Work The Best

I caught with B last night. I have never thought of it actually as I have been channeling my focus on other areas, or perhaps someone else, lately. Never would have thought I could get to see him bit it was good although it did smudged my feelings and focus once again. After the incident, it just made me wonder and question a lot about A. While I was supposed to be having a good night by going out and enjoying myself and at the same time to see for myself what's out there, it got me thinking whether I wanted A was simply because I have let him in or was it simply because he was the nearest substitute I could get. If it was the latter, then it would not have been fair to anyone, especially himself. I really don't wanna do the wrong thing, but at the same time. I couldn't achieve the right thing because B's definition of the right thing and mine are totally different and also going towards different directions. 

While I was really trying my best to adapt to the transition from B to A, the truth is, sometimes old tricks still work better, because of the familiarity to it all. Now that it has messed with my feelings, I'm just not sure whether I love B more or just simply the fact that I have loved him longer. Well, whatever it is, I guess only time can tell.

He Loves Me

The other day, I was catching up with B after all this while. After quite some time too. After some period of crankiness as well. Well the session was still as hot and romantic as before. However, the thing is that when he was about to leave, he said that he loves me. I was in total shock or disbelief to say the least. But we've already agreed that our relationship would remain a very special friendship. I told him about A and how I think he might be a potential replacement to him. He seems to be OK with it and therefore I asked the ultimate question, whether he would want me to let A in. He said yes because he thought that A seems to be a nice guy and all. Well, even me myself has started to act towards that fact unconsciously. As in, I would dream about him and also that I would think about him every now and then as well.  

I could not deny the fact that I did have some difficulty trying to fall asleep last night thinking and playing over and over again the image when B says he loves me. This is the first time he initiates the 'salutation'. I felt  very amazed. And I guess it's reflected in my non-cohesive nor coherent entry into the blog.

The Perfect Man

I have always said that the perfect man for me would have the following characteristics:-

-ginger head, curly hair, split chin, lefty, no specs, not a doctor, taller than me, able to cook, green eyes and most probably not an Asian (with no racism intended, just a preference)

However, these few weeks of my solo journey without B made me realize that all these are not as important if you can't spend the rest of your life without him. B has fulfilled most of the list.

He does not wear specs, he is in fact taller than me, he is able to cook (very well too), he is not a doctor nor an Asian, while the rest of him are dark blonde, neat hair, wrinkly eyes, right-handed and light blue eyes. Hey, but so what? He is the guy whom I've spent the most amazing 9 months with. He is the guy who actually cares for me. Sadly, he just might not be the guy who can stay by my side. But if there's is any slight chance that he can, who cares whether he is older than me by a leap of years? Well, at least I know I don't.

Somehow, all these made me realize that he is the one. He is my perfect man.

It's Time To Face Things

I'll admit it. Yeah, my results this semester were not so good or probably not good at all considering how it is the worst of all my time here at the ANU. But what can I say. Even though B and I technically broke up on the 5th week but the blues and stress have been going on ever since the exam period. Ever since that he did not wish me good luck.

I'm not exactly sure now whether liking or hating someone is easier. One thing that I do know is that he might have cheated on me when we were together. Not sure whether is the sorta cheating that everyone refers to, or the fact that he has been lying at times. I'm not exactly sure how things are gonna work out, but why can't I just enjoy being single? Why am I so afraid of being alone and being reminded of the wonderful times that I have spent with B? Am I in denial? I actually have no room for that sorta of thinking at the moment. All I want to know is that I'm "clean" when I receive my results this coming Thursday. It's very important to me.

For how long that I have not been updating this blog is for how long that I have been running from my own sadness and try not to feel bad about it. I know that I would have A now but is he the better man or the better substitute? That's because I do not want to substitute him for B. I feel that is unfair for him because he is such a nice guy but at the same time I do not dare to treat him like the better man because I'm not sure yet whether he has the same feelings for me or not.

Taking the bus this coming Thursday might be another nostalgic ride. Because the other day, sitting in the bus while waiting for it to take me to my destination, the whole journey only reminded me of one thing. The moments that I have had with B. All the wonderful memories of the past year. So I was wondering whether it is time to fit all those parts and parcels of my life into a box and seal it away in one corner of my heart? The thing is I was so ready to 'delete' B from my system until he gave me a ring the other day that started to create false hopes in me again. Sigh. Another thing that's hurting is the fact that he's not replying my texts or calls. Is he avoiding me on purpose, for the so-called right thing to do? I dunno. I can't read minds. Only time will tell, somehow that's the feelings I got.

Exam..or weekend blues..

Workaholic. I wonder how someone becomes a workaholic. Staying in the library since this morning looking at the accounting stuffs that I need to master by Monday morning for a few hours has already gotten me sick to the stomach. I really wonder how B does it. I wonder how someone can really be so into his/her work that he/she can just momentarily cuts him/herself from the world. If there’s anyone that would ever do that, it definitely would not be me. Today is also officially that we haven’t caught up for 3 weeks. During these last few days, especially after that conversation really makes me wonder whether he’s the right person anymore. Why do I suddenly have doubts in him? Is that the reason why he kept on saying he’s not good enough? Is it because of his experience and all that tell him he’s that sorta person who would not fit into my life?

And I’m kinda struggling too. Suffering inside that how on earth am I gonna tell him the whole thing. Because I know it sucks to hold it in and live with that guilt. Well, I guess what I’m really scare of is the fact that I wouldn’t know how he’s gonna react to it. Do I want him to be OK with it or do I want him to feel bad and sorta hates me a little bit? I dunno which is actually better. I really have no idea. No idea on whether I would be able to fork up the courage at the end to let him know about the whole thing. I just think that a healthy relationship needs to have a certain level of honesty. And I just think the only way to spill out the truth would be to keep embracing positive thoughts and just do it!

Besides, was I ever a workaholic before this? I dunno. But the one thing that I know for sure is the fact that I am not doing that great anymore in my studies. Used to be the perfectionist when it comes to academics, but now it just seems so less important. Looking at the PETS website this afternoon to look out for new announcements, and it was then I realized that the people who actually would be SI-ed this coming July are actually selected based on their academic performance. It was selected for people who managed to maintain a WAM of 75/80. After I calculated the WAM for all the 11 courses that I have done so far, I realized that my WAM was only somewhere like 73. OMG, right? I am now officially only an average D student. No longer being on the top of my game. I was wondering whether it’s the relationship with B as well.

After watching another episode of Gossip Girl where Blair just said that she has loved Chuck too much and she didn’t like the person she’s turning into because of that. Is the same thing happening to me? I mean, loving B too much that I’m to retarded to function. Because I think, B is right to a certain extent when he says he wants me to be able to ‘do stuffs’ which I often vaguely rejected over the past few months because I was secretly hoping that I would get the chance to get up with B. Sigh. A little too late to be regretful, isn’t it?

And that’s exactly how I’m feeling right now, while typing this entry, thinking that I haven’t really put much effort into doing my assignments this semester, if any, at all! My gosh! What in the name of God has happened to me? At the beginning of the year, I was like promising myself that I wanna get at least 3 HDs this semester. It is still do-able at this stage, just that I really need to nail that remaining two papers. Well, I better, considering how those two subjects are my majors and the only thing I can be proud of. Plus hopefully I did alright for Italian.

At first, I was feeling a bit relieved to have realized that I could actually substitute EMET1001 with some other second year course to still be able to get my finance major. And that would allow me to continue on my Italian for the next semester. And that’s what got me to the CPA website and, out of curiosity, that’s what got me to click on the Skilled Migration Assessment link and what got me browsing on the immigration website for more than an hour! Wondering whether would I ever be able to extend my stay over here. Sigh. I just think it is so no fair. Not fair that I am being exposed to this wonderful part of the world with wonderful experiences and when the time is up, I’m supposed to leave and wake up from my wonderful dream. That’s utterly so unacceptable. Well, I can only pray and hope that it would all turn out right in the end. Who knows, I might strike a $30m lotto! LOL!

Workaholic

Workaholic. I wonder how someone becomes a workaholic. Staying in the library since this morning looking at the accounting stuffs that I need to master by Monday morning for a few hours has already gotten me sick to the stomach. I really wonder how B does it. I wonder how someone can really be so into his/her work that he/she can just momentarily cuts him/herself from the world. If there’s anyone that would ever do that, it definitely would not be me. Today is also officially that we haven’t caught up for 3 weeks. During these last few days, especially after that conversation really makes me wonder whether he’s the right person anymore. Why do I suddenly have doubts in him? Is that the reason why he kept on saying he’s not good enough? Is it because of his experience and all that tell him he’s that sorta person who would not fit into my life?

And I’m kinda struggling too. Suffering inside that how on earth am I gonna tell him the whole thing. Because I know it sucks to hold it in and live with that guilt. Well, I guess what I’m really scare of is the fact that I wouldn’t know how he’s gonna react to it. Do I want him to be OK with it or do I want him to feel bad and sorta hates me a little bit? I dunno which is actually better. I really have no idea. No idea on whether I would be able to fork up the courage at the end to let him know about the whole thing. I just think that a healthy relationship needs to have a certain level of honesty. And I just think the only way to spill out the truth would be to keep embracing positive thoughts and just do it!

Besides, was I ever a workaholic before this? I dunno. But the one thing that I know for sure is the fact that I am not doing that great anymore in my studies. Used to be the perfectionist when it comes to academics, but now it just seems so less important. Looking at the PETS website this afternoon to look out for new announcements, and it was then I realized that the people who actually would be SI-ed this coming July are actually selected based on their academic performance. It was selected for people who managed to maintain a WAM of 75/80. After I calculated the WAM for all the 11 courses that I have done so far, I realized that my WAM was only somewhere like 73. OMG, right? I am now officially only an average D student. No longer being on the top of my game. I was wondering whether it’s the relationship with B as well.

After watching another episode of Gossip Girl where Blair just said that she has loved Chuck too much and she didn’t like the person she’s turning into because of that. Is the same thing happening to me? I mean, loving B too much that I’m to retarded to function. Because I think, B is right to a certain extent when he says he wants me to be able to ‘do stuffs’ which I often vaguely rejected over the past few months because I was secretly hoping that I would get the chance to get up with B. Sigh. A little too late to be regretful, isn’t it?

And that’s exactly how I’m feeling right now, while typing this entry, thinking that I haven’t really put much effort into doing my assignments this semester, if any, at all! My gosh! What in the name of God has happened to me? At the beginning of the year, I was like promising myself that I wanna get at least 3 HDs this semester. It is still do-able at this stage, just that I really need to nail that remaining two papers. Well, I better, considering how those two subjects are my majors and the only thing I can be proud of. Plus hopefully I did alright for Italian.

At first, I was feeling a bit relieved to have realized that I could actually substitute EMET1001 with some other second year course to still be able to get my finance major. And that would allow me to continue on my Italian for the next semester. And that’s what got me to the CPA website and, out of curiosity, that’s what got me to click on the Skilled Migration Assessment link and what got me browsing on the immigration website for more than an hour! Wondering whether would I ever be able to extend my stay over here. Sigh. I just think it is so no fair. Not fair that I am being exposed to this wonderful part of the world with wonderful experiences and when the time is up, I’m supposed to leave and wake up from my wonderful dream. That’s utterly so unacceptable.

Trying to Figure It out...

Woke up at around 5 this morning. Just couldn't sleep. Lying on my bed, rolling about and thinking much about him and miss him lots too.

Of all my 20 years worth of experience watching love dramas and romantic movies, I know there are two types of girls (well, in conventional context) in this world when it comes to guys. One is the type who will put aside anything, anything for the sake for the guy that she loves. The other type is the one who moves on and does her own stuffs and probably does not pay as much attention to her man as the time she spends with her own career or similar stuffs like that. Well, I guess you all can know by now that I'm probably 90% the former and 10% the latter.

Well, what can I do about it? Like, seriously? Am born a love angel with a soft and fragile heart that cares more about others than my own self.

And yes, just in case you're wondering, I am hurt. Hurt and hurt deeply. It is painful because B is still in Canberra and we have the capacity to be with each other still but he just shuts me off and kinda left in the dark wondering. Wondering whether I would be able to see him again or even have a decent conversation again.

As much as I always say that I would love him to stay in Canberra, the fact is I love him enough to let him go if he gets a new job elsewhere. I love him enough to not be selfish to keep him by my side and restrict him from having the future or career that he wants. I guess at the end of the day, I just have to reflect on what's the meaning of love in this kinda situation.

But now, now he's still here. I don't see any reason for us not to be together. All I'm asking for is that before the time comes, I just ask for us to be together as much as we can. The so-called 'cherish the moment'.

Looking back…

Watching back the drama series that I love so much a few years back, it reminds me of how naive, innocent and shallow I used to be. That’s the me a few years back. Way different from the me today. Different probably for the way I express myself nowadays as turning 21 is just another way of saying that it is time to put a stop to acting childishly. However, people don’t really know the way I think or I feel deep inside my heart. Still soft and fragile as before. Still hopeful and overly optimistic at times. Still willing to do anything for someone who managed to capture and captivate my heart.

But somehow, I think that the change is good. Good because today I have someone close to my heart that I can actually be and spend time with. Unlike in the past, where I can like that person from afar and wonder whether my feelings would be reciprocated, which is pretty much not.

Speaking about change, it also reminded me lots about my ambitions before this. I have always wanted to be a superstar who one day could be as famous and hot-selling as LadyGaGa, if not more. But the other day, it just daunts on me that how much one would have to sacrifice in order to reach that state in life. The time, the availability for friends/family/loved ones etc.

And the other day, while doing my revision at the library, I was just thinking and wondering “Is being an accountant really something that I want?” even though this must be the millionth time I have asked myself the same-old question. Is obsessing about PwC really something that I have passion about? Well, I can’t say for sure but what I can say for sure is that it suddenly daunts on me, what if, what if what I really want in life is just the ability to enjoy life. Inspired after watching SATC2, I was wondering how nice it would be to be a writer, writing about things I have passion for (like now), and spend the spare time that I have while not writing with my friends, family and loved ones, and also cooking and experimenting with crazy and creative ideas, plus going through the ultimate dining experience every week. Wouldn’t a life like that be super-duper wonderful? (I think now you what I mean when I say my thinking is still pretty naive and childish.) But, I think this kinda lifestyle is achievable. It could be my retirement plans. No harm if I could spend the rest of my life with him. And that’s definitely something worth fighting for.

Transferred from betabetasigma

What If I’m The One

I used to say whoever falls for a person so deeply that they cannot function properly or normally is silly. What if I’m the type myself?

What if I’m already fully being swallowed into the world of “Love is blind”? But it is indeed blind. Love is something that will always be bias, because if not, that would not be love anymore. The main reason that we have bias opinions for the things/people we love is simply because we love them that we wannna protect them. Protect them from being abused by others. Protect them from the harmful words and comments those outsiders have.

Therefore, I’m proud to say, or even announce, that I don’t care if I’m being labelled as the one. The reason? Well, I would rather be labelled because I would rather know that my capacity to love is so overly powering than the fact that I’m overly cautious to not allow myself to be brave enough to be submerged into the ocean of love. That’s a process and that’s a whole new experience. No doubt about it but it’s a process that we can learn more about ourselves and be prepared to love someone/something more deeply than ever.

Transferred from betabetasigma

I’m Best At What I Do Best

It’s been quite some time and I thought it’s time to come back and share some interesting news with everyone. Well, this post will be mainly about myself. I think I’m best at ‘running’. Running in quotation marks because I don’t mean it literally. I meant it when in times of desperation, in times of stress, in times of uncertainties, that’s what I do best.

Just get out of it and forget about it for a little while. Just like going out for a jog or a run I suppose. But I’ll strike back eventually. Just a matter of time. I know it’s not the best solution or not the best way in any situation to handle things but that’s who I am.

I can’t help it. There are so many rough ups and downs in my life, and that’s how I handled it every single time. I think the important element here is to be able to reflect and self-evaluate later on. Well, until I come up with a better solution, that’s the method that I’m gonna stick with, and that’s my method since I was a child. I run. Run away from all the problems. And that’s what I do best in life.

Transferred from betabetasigma

Things Are Different Now

You think you are good, but there’s someone out there better than you.
You think you are sneaky, but there’s someone out there sneakier than you.
You think you have hurt someone before, but there’s someone who has hurt more people or caused more hurt than you.

These are the things that we will never know. These are the things that are forever changing.

Sometimes when you are fighting hard for someone, then at one point it just occurs to you, “What’s the point now?!”.

Yeah, that’s the scary part of things because that’s when you’ll be facing the fork, thinking which way to turn and which road to take. And also you’ll wondering about the consequences of each of the alternatives. That’s when you’ll realize things are different now, because you would have known what to do or what you would have done, but instead you stood there thinking, which one. That’s the sign that the ways you handle things are now different from the past.

Transferred from betabetasigma

My Shoes Your Shoes

They say if something old is not worth keeping anymore, then it is time to find new ones. But at the end of the day, who’s ‘they’? That’s the big question that needs to be solved here. Well, who would take advice from some hypocritical people who themselves only know how to judge people but at the end of the day, would not acknowledge their owns and advice given not taken, right?

Again, I think it’s the matter of putting ourselves in other people’s shoes sometimes. It’s ok to be judgy (judgemental) but would it be ok to judge someone before knowing the whole package of the story? Without the effort to investigate what really is going on? Definitely NO says the Queen B. Even the queen does not do that. Remember it’s all about balance. Sometimes things that we can see or hear are all from the perspectives of a third person. What about first hand point of contact? What about the person itself? Sure there’s a purpose of certain people doing whatever that they’re doing. So long as that pure motive is not hurting anyone, it should be acceptable. Just like in the case of people saying it’s a white lie, after balancing out the pros and cons, it’s better to lie than tell the truth. Hence, the movie “The Invention of Lying”. Eg. people say that there’s a heaven to comfort and ease the feelings of those who’re dying, to let them have something more to believe once they have left The Middle Earth, but is there really such a thing as heaven? No one really knows that for sure unless those who have been dead then suddenly sprang back to life. But people still spread the belief that there’s a heaven. Same concept here.

So remember, bitches, next time before you lay any judgement on anyone, be thoroughly sure that you have been through all that you can before being judgy. Personally, the queen has met a DH and it’s kinda annoying, the same feeling of annoyance while watching him on GG.

Trasnferred from betabetasigma

A Fortress, A Well

I might not be perfect. I might not have everything that I would like to want in my life. Well, in fact, no one shouldn't. Life is never perfect but then again it depends how we would like to define the term 'perfect'. At times, I really dunno how this world works, and that's a very frank opinion. At times, I really don't understand why people are doing what they are doing either to themselves or to other people. But then again, I'm not brought to this world to play God and to figure out everything at once. Life is a journey as I always say. However, there's one thing that I know for sure. No matter how I fall or how hard I fall or whenever I fall, at least I know there's someone to catch me. I call this my fortress. And this fortress is my family. I used to not know or understand the true values of family but along the way I think I'm getting there.

I came to college with a total different kinda expectations. But what I'm getting here are just about half of what I would like myself to get. Sometimes I wonder whether I'm trying to hard. And, honestly, college can be a scary place. There are so many kinds of people who act in very different ways. All kinds of people actually. But then again, it is also a place of exposure and for us to learn things and to grow up. I guess, it's just the process.

As of now, I only know that the best remedy would be for me to cry. Yeah, as in crying with tears. Well, I can't really explain it. It's just me. Sort of need to cry once in a while. Well, not the kinda crying where people got hurt or sorts. But, through some really sad or touching scenes in movies and the like to channel my feelings, I suppose. How do I put in writing so that everyone can understand me? Well, it's just like a mug. It can only store as much water. When it's full, some have to be poured out before some fresh water can be poured in, right? That's exactly how I am. Weird, I know, but that's just who I am. I used to channel everything through the use of music and drama series. But now, since they are not of reach, I guess it's kinda difficult.

Sometimes we say friends are the next in line after family. Well, that description only makes sense if they are the right kinda friends. Now, I also sorta finally know why people say people from big cities are different to people from small towns. Finally understood. 

我不是万能的

LuvBoBo

The Meaning of Love

It's been a couple of days, I know, since I last posted something here but the truth is, what can I do when I have other commitments to deal with. Even though I might be busy with some other types of priorities, that has not stopped me from thinking and wondering about the meaning of love.

These few days I have been wondering what would be the true meaning of love. It's ironic I found. Let me tell you why. Some people truly love some one yet they find it so hard to mention that 3 words which consisted of 8 letters while others seem to be able to spit it so easily that it makes everyone wonders in the dark whether they truly mean it or not. As far as I'm concerned, I only care about when my special say those 3 words to me, I want them to be truly meaning it and totally ready to commit to true love as I would to them.

Sometimes I really do wish to say that love is in the air that I'm breathing but I just couldn't just yet. If you know what I mean. It is not really a bad thing nor is it a good thing. It is just neutral in the sense that I really would wish to hasten things up so that we all can finally move on to the next chapter but it just is not as easy as saying it. You know how sometimes when we are reading a really thick novel with those tiny words in it, it takes time too to get from one chapter to another but those time taken ensured that the true picture and story are truly understood by the reader. The same analogy applies here. The time taken to fix things would ensure that whatever survived the test of time would be something worthwhile.

LuvBoBo

I Told Him

As the title of this entry suggests, yeah, I have told B last night that I think I have fallen for him and I love him. He simply replied that he would call me today and he really likes me too. What is the degree of difference between 'like' and 'love'? Because, in my opinion, he's just being careful as he always is.
Well, I did what I did last night because it was the signs of the month from my Yahoo! horoscope. Oh, well. I'm not sure this state is supposed to be naive or pathetic. But I'm kinda sure it's the better one, whichever it is. Hope it would really turn into something I have hoped for so long all this while.
LuvBoBo

Not-A-Too-Bad Way To Start The New Year

Well, it felt really nice to have someone called you immediately they have arrived from a holiday overseas. B kinda has me somewhere in his heart after all. And that's not all. He also took the effort to catch up with me last night. And it was....well..you know..(I certainly do not want to provide too much details..hem hem..). I am just so glad that he told me we would be like in a real relationship after all and stuffs like that. You know, how can a person resist this kinda feeling when that particular someone has fallen so much for the other person. I know you can understand my language. Haha. Well, in short, the point is I'm just so happy that we were able to catch up and the rest is history.

There's certainly heaps more that I would like to write about but I just could not put them in words. No idea why. So I guess till next time then.

LuvBoBo