my jay chou collection

after a few more weeks..I'm gonna further my studies overseas..one of the things that I think I might find it hard to leave behind is my jay chou collection..can I ever live 3 years without them..is no even an option..I mean I can't really bring all the CDs and merchandises over..haiz..what a big headache..if they are not with me..will I change my preference in years to come..will I be more attracted to overseas singers..haiz..dilemma..what can I do other than saying that I would really miss them..for sure I would..no lies..
what has jay chou done to me..haha..

what is future like?

I guess for those who have already known me for quite some time definitely know that I'm currently moving on a track what others have set for me..not quite the one I really wanted..in about a few more weeks I'm gonna move on to another level or rather another dimension of my life..I'm not really sure whether I'm prepared for it or not..but at the same time I just dunno why I act like I already in front of others..and I've already slowly starting to realize that I'm slowly but consciously letting my childhood dream slipping away from my grip..am I really ready for that kind of change..I really have no answer for that..sometimes I can only live a day and wonder a day..in these past few days I have pondered upon the reality of life..all I could say is that I still believe in dreams and miracles in this world..so I will always tell myself not to give up so easily..who knows..a powerful question..'cos really nobody knows what's really gonna happen in the future..even just minutes or seconds apart..

LuvBoBo..

Sunday 07 September 2008

Today I finally went to the Shah Alam Buddhist Temple, after so many weeks of absence over there. But it was a tremendous wow. I really learned a lot from one of my favorite speakers, Dr. Chan. She’s a great speaker. Maybe she’s a speaker whom I really look up to at Dharma talks. She shared about the five precepts and the five ennoblers today in a very interesting way as usual. I guess only hers and Uncle Vijaya’s talks have not made me dozed off so far. They are able to present their talks in a very well planned and organized manner. Perhaps it’s due to the fact that they are both teachers. Well, if I were to really like the career of teaching, I really do have a lot to learn from these two super seniors. In my opinion, the part that really captured my attention for the Dharma talk today was the second part rather than the first because the latter was more towards answering those FAQ that really freed our minds from cracking just to figure out how to put the five precepts into proper daily practices. However, the second part was really amazing as it let me realize how much I would still have to catch up to be not only a better Buddhist, but also as an improved person as a whole i.e. a student, a learner and so on. Metta. This is really a very strong word to me now as, if I’m not mistaken; it all starts with the generating and sharing of loving kindness to all beings in this world. It’s just so wonderful and perfect that made me didn’t regret at all attending today’s session. And I just don’t know why each time I attended a Dharma talk, I just have that kind of relief in me which eventually made me feel happier and lighter, besides being wiser and seeing things in a more open-minded way. I guess that’s just what a holy place such as the temple can do to us. Haha. From this moment onwards, I’m gonna really try my real best to practice metta as I would wanna have the love and peace surrounding me. Wish me luck. Haha. And today is also officially the 7th day I fast which is equivalent to a week; that is if I were fasting today. I didn’t because I knew I was going to the temple so no religious conflict, alright. Luv BoBo.

妈妈的爱

今天我得了一个新发现
我发现到妈妈脸上的憔悴
我发现到妈妈这些年来真的老了
我发现到妈妈这些年的努力和付出
都设为了孩子们
而我能感觉到她最大的付出是为了我
为了看到毕业
为了看到我做有用的人
我突然间好想妈妈哟
突然间好想跟她道谢
也很想跟他道歉
有时候生命就是这样
竟然会没发现这些得点点滴滴
身为一个孩子的我怎么可以没注意到这些呢
我突然间觉得好失败哦
不过这也是一件好事
跟加的给了我突破力
让我继续的生命里奋斗
我知道我这些年来都没有为了妈妈做过很多事
他却一直不断地为了孩子们的幸福和生活而遭想
我也还不懂我这一生能够为妈妈做多少
但我一直相信只要他开心我就快乐这道理
所以妈妈
我一定会为了你得到一个很好的成绩的
虽然说这一切都不是我最想要的
但我相信大家所作出来的选择一定都是为了我得最好
所以就算再难
只要是为了妈妈而奋斗
都是值得的
因为我也知道其实妈妈是知道我的么梦想的
虽然我没有被应许去追寻它
但我也没有被逼过去放弃它
所以我觉得这就是一家人的互相了解
互相信任
和互相背后默默的支持
到最后还是老话一句
我爱妈妈

new dimension in life

Monday 01 sept 2008
Today is the first day of the fasting month..i made it through..i wasn’t having very much of a trouble at all..minus the fact that I felt thirsty and boring the whole day..haha..but at least I didn’t feel hungry at all..it’s quite a challenge for me actually..it’s been two years since I last fasted..but I know if I can make it through the first day..i definitely can make it for the next 29 days..besides saving myself some bit of my allowance..my true purpose is to assist myself in shedding some inches and losing some pounds..haha..but of course the true challenge of it all is to abstain from food..haha..guess what..i really miss him..as a matter of fact..it’s actually very much..haiz..but things interfering my way..i dunno whether it’s a good thing or a bad one..1st in the list to be settled is the Battle of MiNDS..coming next week..but everything is only still in progress..i just hope everything will just turn out fine..i’ve made up my mind that i most probably won’t be debating this season..i do realize that it’s my last chance to be seen in the international arena..but somehow after looking back and really come to think of it..i don’t think this is my true interest..if I’m like just there for the sake of winning..it doesn’t even worth anything..plus I’m not the kinda person who’s really enthusiastic about the rotten politics happening outside..even social and economic issues..all this craps reported are always so heart-breaking and stressing..but I do agree on the fact that I’m really concerned about the environment..unless there’s a pure environment debate..don;t think about seeing me in the debating world again..i just happen to realize that all this stress and pressure are unnecessary in my life..and it’s making miserable rather than feeling that I’ve achieved something in my life..whatever it is..my duty is just to make sure that the BOM would run smoothly..then on to work all out for my trials..then have a break and recharge before I really gear up for the SSABSA finals..go KK..i know very well that u can do it..how I wish these words come from his very own mouth..but I do know that he might be facing his own problems out there..so I guess we shall all do our best together..Luv BoBo..

changes

miracles

a couple of days ago i can still remember it very well that i was saying to my friend that i would not be able to send his flight off..

and the words are still very clear in my mind..

"i hope that there is miracle so we can meet that day"..

the exact words and emotion that i used that day to express how i expressed my disappointment for being able to there to send his flight off but at the same time i believed there is still hope for us to see each other on that day..

and now i'm sitting here in front of my computer rewinding how i actually felt on that particular day when i get to the fact that i'm so gonna miss him when he flew off to begin a new page of his journey of life..

considering the fact that he'd gonna be in the US and the time difference factor and also the difficulty that we might face to communicate with each other despite the fact that technology is wonderful nowadays..

and tomorrow is actually a big day..

i'm not really sure myself as well whether getting the opportunity to send him off is actually a good thing or a bad one..

the good thing is that we are still able to meet each other for the very last time before he flies..

the bad part about it is that i'm actually seeing him leaving in front of my very own eyes..

that's really a big thing to bear too..

i dunno..

i guess i'd rather be happy that we're actually able to meet then be sad during my flight..

yeah..

i'm actually in another flight at 6.05 pm..

but we're two very seperate ways..he's heading north while me south..

haiz..dunno how to arrange my emotions right now..it seems like i'm starting to get moody already..

but whatever it'll turn out to be..i'm definitely praying that everything's gonna turn out fine tomorrow..Luv BoBo..